58- Negotiating Halloween

Class Mommy has been driving me nuts about throwing a Halloween Party. For a while, she had settled down and hadn’t been in much to disrupt my classroom. Class Mommy’s hiatus is clearly over, as she is now in full party planning mode.
Holiday parties are a touchy subject in public schools. We’re really not supposed to celebrate anymore. Halloween is particularly taboo. The good old days of dressing up, trick-or-treating through the school, and then eating candy are over. These days, there is a lot of pressure to respect religious differences. Muslims, Jews, and Evangelical Christians are among the religious groups that do not want Halloween celebrated in public schools. Halloween is considered to be a pagan holiday that celebrates The Devil.
When I broke the news to Class Mommy that Halloween was not allowed to be celebrated in our school, the woman flipped out. She is a modern day, head in the clouds, housewife who spends more time thinking about her tennis racket than worldly affairs.
Class Mommy argued that “Religious differences are ridiculous and that all children love candy.” I had to agree that most kids do like candy, but according to the new Cupcake Law, teachers are not allowed to give out sweets to kids in school.
Negotiating with Class Mommy is like negotiating with a deaf six year old. Apparently she’s got some strong connections in Heaven, because this afternoon Class Mommy told me, “Jesus wants the children to dress up and have treats on Halloween.”
Is she daring me to debate Jesus?
“Not all students worship Jesus.” I told her.
Class Mommy looked aghast. She peered around the room, closely studying my students, “Which ones?” she asked in a disapproving whisper. Her eyes settled on her own daughter, Francesca, who was chatting happily with Gaby on the Reading Rug. “It’s not Gaby, is it?”
Until I met Class Mommy, I didn’t realize that educated, affluent women could also be social retards. I avoided disclosing personal religious information about my students and agreed to let her plan some type of party for Halloween.
“No costumes. No candy. No Halloween decorations.” I repeated these rules several times. “Please, healthy snacks only.”
“Francesca really wants to wear her ballerina costume.” Class Mommy whined like a child.
“No costumes at school.” I stated for the billionth time. “And it has to be a short party- one that does not take a lot of time away from their usual lessons.”
Class Mommy stomped her foot a couple of times. She pressed her lips together and considered my party rules. “Fine,” was all she said before whisking herself out of my classroom.